17 July 2014, Okay… It’s been a very long time since i’ve blogged but this post is gonna be rather short, tonight my fatehr called and when my mother informed him that i haven’t done anything in these past few weeks other than isolate myself in my room and sit in front of my laptop and surf the internet for no absolute reason. Well partially it’s my fault too since i like being under stress, it makes me feel more like my life is an ongoing story with many obstacles that i am forced to solve on my own all alone, which i did last year. I understood that i can’t really have friends due to my well.. mind state, but now i guess i’ll be forced to find and discover new friends again mostly because of my father or by my own willingness to change my attitude and i might have to forgive some people on whom i was planning my revenge. Since my second year in college is gonna start soon after 4 days i have decided to change my hairstyle and clothing appearance every year( honestly i was inspired by ‘The Doctor’ from the well acclaimed tv series Doctor Who). Also i gotta start learning some core programming languages for my own benefit in the future. Well that’s all folks, i’ll see u guys next time….
April 18th 2014,
Even though these events happened 8 days prior to me blogging about it I really want to share my experience about it. I was left home alone for two months and my cousin decided to take advantage of it and on 10th he brought some of his friends along with him to my house to smoke weed. I decided to let them do it because I wanted to know what it feels like to be ‘high’. When everyone was done getting stoned, it was my turn. But surprisingly I was unaffected by it’s effects!
No matter how many joints I took, I never felt high or dizzy. All I felt was well myself….So I decided to invite them again after a couple of days and try it again but I was still immune to that stuff. This is kind of a great relief for me because I do strange things only to blend with people, Last time I tried to make friends in my college but I couldn’t succeed but this time I just don’t like trying some disgusting stuff to ‘fit in’.
January 2 2014, it’s been a long time since I have blogged and also today was a very first experience of college’s party life. it started at 11:00 at one of the most popular nightclubs of Hyderabad, The Rain. When everyone arrived the senior students called up each freshmen year student to introduce themselves, tell some best and saddest thing about them and do something to impress the senior students. When my turn came, everything went okey dokey I guess. I told everything I told and then I was asked to flirt with a freshmen girl which I did. Unfortunately, she turned out to be the daughter of my middle school history teacher which really pissed me off but I did in fact impress the seniors.
After that five finalists were selected for the next where they were suppose to dance or act like someone. Two of them danced on some stupid indian music but the other two acted as miley cyrus and a hyderabadi beggar. After that more two finalists were selected out of those five and they were supposed to impress the seniors,however, this type of impression was a little different. Freshmen girls were suppose to impress senior boys and Freshmen boys were suppose to impress senior girls. After that, Mister fresher, Miss fresher were selected and then mister and miss rose as well as mister and miss popular & mister and miss attire. Lucky for me my class is gonna be definitely popular because mister attire, mister popular and miss attire are from my class,:D.
Then at last everybody started dancing on the dancefloor and that’s when it really got awkward for me. I CAN’T DANCE!!!. But anyways I really enjoyed it and this experience is gonna last in my mind for at least three years till I move on to united states.
October 15 2013, Today I found out that my friends aren’t really my ‘friends’. When one of them called me to give back his notebook from all way to some café I saw him smoking hookah with his real friends. That’s when I realized that piece of shit was never my friend and only took my presence for granted. Unfortunately for me that’s not the first time , Since I was 12 I tried in vain to have friends but now that I am 18 what’s the use of trying now ?. It’s over. I am done wasting my life in search for friendship to chase happiness, I can find happiness by myself all alone anyways. I don’t think I might ever be able to have friends and I guess I am destined to be all alone. If that’s the case then I got no problem with it, I have no problem in embracing myself as a loner.
However being a loner isn’t bad at all !!! Now that I am 18 and only three years left for me to go off to USA , I am ready to face the world all alone with no support. Friends are nothing but distraction and being alone makes me focus more on my studies(especially programming, which gonna help me big time in my upcoming future career as a game designer) and become more mature. I could also easily travel anywhere around the world and explore it alone . But since I am gonna be going to united states after three years for my master’s degree, I might finally meet a real friend I guess.
October 9 2013, Today I skipped four of my college classes ; English, chemistry and engineering mechanics to go to cuppa house and smoke some ‘hookah’ cuz I was just kinda curious what it felt like. And now I do. It feels very nauseating and it gave me a very big headache & dizzy feeling. My friends were able to smoke hookah for more than four hours but I couldn’t even stand to smoke for even two minutes. After a half an hour, another friend of mine shows up and then other two acquaintances from my college show up and that’s when we all six sat down and started talking about various things we all guys talk about; girls, dirty jokes and then me, two of my college friends & another guy( who’s my friend’s school friend) started smoking hookah again and that’s when I became so dizzy that I fell asleep on the table for a minimum of 45-54 minutes I guess :/.
Anyways, as I was partially asleep my friends started chatting about various topics and after I woke up to find out that it’s raining heavily outside. When the rain cooled down a little bit we decided to go home & left our own separate ways.
The lesson I learned from this experience ? Never skip classes and smoke hookah cuz it’s really messes up your mind easily. But I got no choice, I only smoke it to blend in with others.
28 September 2013, Today was the orientation day in my engineering college for all the freshman year students which also includes me. When I arrived to the auditorium hall(where it’s being held) I spotted three of my junior college’s classmates. I dunno about the rest of the two but the other one chose civil and will be pursuing a bachelor’s degree in civil engineering. As for me I am gonna be pursuing a bachelor’s degree in Information Technology. Anyways, for half an hour all those board members and deans of the courses like mechanical, computer science lectured about the importance of youth and anti-bullying thingy blah blah blah and that’s when I started to get really bored so I decided to pass my time playing subway surf on my cellphone. After the lecture they showed us our classes and I got surprised to find one of my junior classmates as a classmate AGAIN ! lol but I guess that’s cool. During that the dean of IT told us about bullying and other bullcrap stuff again and then some seniors showed up apparently they also happen to be club members. They told us we could could other extra curricular activities like these clubs and now I gotta go pick one club ! – Robotics club or computer club? Both are good though ! But I chose to go for computer club for my own personal reasons( I am gonna tell u about them in the future). Although I didn’t really have a good time because of ‘ the woman whom I refuse to call my mother’ cuz she kept irritating me and wanted to leave. All that time I was thinking why the fuck did she come with me ? I could have gone alone without that bitch. And plus she made me hate her even more when she said I would have my visa rejected from US, haha that’s real funny bitch cuz I always get what I want and I will get visa approved by united states & get the hell away from you and start a new life over there. But first thing’s first, What are GRE test and TOEFL test ? U guys know about these test then please comment. Ok bye…